to go or not to go

It's again a new beautiful day....my cold which has chosen to be companion for this cold winter is starting to gain control over me.  My night was full of wake-ups, heartburns, ear-aches and may be some additonal hallucinations.   After sending the kids off to school, how I wanted to rush to my dear lovely warm bed and sip my coffee leisurely there!  I managed to induce enough self-discipline to keep me away from this magical tempting place with all its spells.. because I know as soon as my body hits the bed, a certain kind of coma just happens and there is no getting me back, no matter how loud or persistent you are..your calls will not be answered, and my appointments will be missed..

So, here I am at the living room, had my banana for breakfast and my coffee with me.  I feel so tempted to stay at home today and just let my aching body take its rest.   I am sick, aren't I ...should not I take it off?  But at the same time, I have this opportunity to attend a workshop that I so much wanted to before, and from a perspective of train the trainer, so that I might go and co-facilitate it or lead it later on.  The idea is tempting, thrilling and I love it. 

Yet, I can sense this internal dialogue, going on inside:
- I am so tired, I want to sleep..I am sick..very sick
- Yeah, you should rest.. even today is not an obligatory thing. you can do it later
- But I feel it is a nice opportunity. I want to get started. I love this
- But you consider almost everything an opportunity.. you jumped for work since you were 18 and you thought so too, and you jump at learning like crazy
- But, it really is an opportunity.. I mean all of them .. or not?..All I need is one day break in the middle of the week
- And your current work permits you to.. but you jump again to fill it in

So, it is a battle between going for it, giving what it takes and mainly pushing myself.... and on the other side, it is taking my time, getting more relaxed and pampering myself, I guess.  But too much relaxation for me is not good, either.

I have no answer really.  I will certainly hop off and run to the workshop after swallowing some vitamins to aid me through the day... but what is it that is right?  Is it pushing yourself to achieve your goals, persisting and putting in the effort to make sure you progress .. or should it be taking life less stressfully, listening to your body, giving room to adhoc needs for rest...
Which is it?  which is it that leads to our enjoyable life?  May be that's it.... may be enjoyment should be one of the criteria by which we evaluate our options.  I am sure when we were kids that was the main factor for selecting one game over another. 

Or may be it is this same harmonious balance of opposites that exist in this world.  I see a pattern that embraces all things and its opposite in one, and only in that sense it becomes perfect.  Like when I say I am so small in this world, which gives a true perspective of how trivial some things are, and at the same time, I know how significant I am, because I have an impact on myself, on my friends and on the whole universe in one way or another.  And it is only in striking this frequency of balance between "doing and being" "relaxation and work" and many other things, that true happiness emerge and that the perfect world displays itself.   It is as if in order to have the blue we cannot have the green only but a yellow must exist, and this applies to work and rest, too.. Without rest, we can;t work and without work rest does not make us feel any more rested.  

So, the trick is finding that balance or at least a harmonious co-existence between them all and between all the voices battling inside of us.